Live, Laugh, Love: The Ballad Of The Basic Bitch

“She damn near had a heart attack when she looked down at her iPhone and it said “no service” when she tried to text her BFF.
Thirty seconds later, she had all five bars again – made a peace sign and a duck face, put it up on Instagram.”

“He’s An Old Hippie” meets the modern day white girl from the First World Problems meme, complete with pumpkin spice and fuzzy boots.  This song is free for you to listen to until you get tired of it. It’s my gift to anyone who’s ever called bullshit on the line at Starbucks and walked across the street to Denny’s for real coffee instead.